Saturday, January 23, 2016

The Revenant: a few thoughts

  • The Revenant: a 3 hour immersive masterclass in male grunting
  • Man eats nothing but snow and roadkill for months and still looks like his 20y/o supermodel girlfriend is cooking him too many omelettes
  • If Leo wins an Oscar for this I quit
  • The best bit is when Leo spends the night in the horsetel
  • The stamina to survive shown by Leo's character is nothing on the stamina required to sit through this film
  • Tom Hardy should win the Oscar for best Matthew McConaughey impression in a Supporting Role
  • Pocahontas was really good (SO glad they didn't deviate from the traditional representation of Native American women)
  • They should've called it The Irrelevant
Thinking about these things is what got me through the last 20 minutes. Don't judge.... Unless it's this film.